Emerging from a winter slumber
Hello my friends! I have some catching up to do (my last newsletter came out in December!) Since then I have parted ways with Modern Times Beer (the company let all of the designers go) and have since started a new full-time graphic design job in the mobile game industry.
The reason I haven’t kept up with this newsletter is I wasn’t sure how to talk about this!! I have jumped into a completely new industry – software and tech – and for four months I have been wondering if I belong here or not.
If you’re reading this you may also be in pursuit of a creative life like myself. Unfortunately, you know that the path is so unclear and so unique. In my journey thus far I consider myself very focused on stability and security which, to be honest, I feel a little cowardly about. I tell myself this: I value my independence and would like to continue being able to afford living alone and international travel. I like my co-workers and my company’s values – I’m being compensated very well and there is a healthy respect for work/life balance. I can’t really describe this icky feeling I have – maybe it’s that I have never felt so close to capitalism?
I feel very challenged by the work and at first it was overwhelming (hello imposter syndrome). I even noticed a sneaking feeling to give up and try something else. But I’m holding on – and I’m noticing that my overwhelm is turning into curiosity. I feel myself evolving. I’m noticing that my growth here will help me become better at problem solving, leadership, and decision making.
I’m going to stick it out in the hopes of becoming more confident in myself and my abilities. I will wrap this up with a quote from psychologist M. Scott Peck:
“Yet it is this whole process of meeting and solving problems that life has meaning. Problems are the cutting edge that distinguishes between success and failure. Problems call forth our courage and our wisdom; indeed, they create our courage and our wisdom. It is only because of problems that we grow mentally and spiritually. When we desire to encourage the growth of the human spirit, we challenge and encourage the human capacity to solve problems, just as in school we deliberately set problems for our children to solve. It is through the pain of confronting and resolving problems that we learn. As Benjamin Franklin said, “Those things that hurt, instruct.” It is for this reason that wise people learn not to dread but actually to welcome problems and actually to welcome the pain of problems.”
I am still painting/drawing/collaging every morning! In fact I am putting together a new series of paintings on wood panel I hope to show locally (I’ll talk about that more next time). In the meantime, here are some paintings that I sold recently:
You can find more of my recent paintings on my website
And as if I am not challenging myself enough, I am teaching my first long form art class starting April 30th!! It is in person through Ulna Studio. We will meet weekly for 6 weeks and develop the tools needed to form a consistent art practice, starting with keeping a sketchbook.
I have a lot more art to share and more shows to tell you about but I’ll save it for next time! For now, here are some photos taken of me in my happy place (my home studio) by local photographer Ryan Warner – ryanwarnerphotography on Instagram
The Woman Who Borrowed Memories – Selected Stories by Tove Jansson (my favorite short story so far is The Squirrel, about a woman living alone on an island and a squirrel arrives on a piece of driftwood).
Why I Wake Early – Poems by Mary Oliver
The Road Less Traveled by M. Scott Peck (rereading – it was written in the 80s so reader beware)
Cowboy Bebop (only the first episode so far, trying to get into it!)
Beau is Afraid
Currently listening to:
Vince Guaraldi Trio
I put together this bittersweet spring playlist
I’ll be showing some older work at Fringe & Friends Salon in May
Art in the Park will be back in June – stay tuned!
I’ll have some work in a group show in July at Turn, Turn, Turn on NE Killingsworth – more details on that soon!
Thanks for reading Somehow I Manage – Allie’s Monthly Newsletter! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.